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THROWING KNIVES: WEEKEND HANGOVER

October 22, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

Starting this week every Monday I’ll be bringing you the Weekend Hangover, in which I prescribe those ailing from this weekends failures a little pick-me-up. For those of you suffering within your cubicle I’d suggest a couple of Excedrin and a large dose of Gatorade. Always does the trick for me. Despite not being an Indians fan, I’m pissed the Red Sox came back and will be rooting for the Rockies. I hate the Sox almost as much as the Yanks for similar reasons. I found myself so unsure of what to do with my fantasy WR situation yesterday I asked our editor. You see I was deciding between Welker, Coles and Galloway for the spot alongside Ocho Cinco. Lucky for me, I ignored my editor, and a friend who both suggested Galloway and rolled with Coles and absolutely destroyed my opponent. Suffice to say, next time I’ll e-mail all of Epic instead of just Mr. Fresh. Anyhow, here’s Gisele doing her thing in Miami just 24 hours before Tom did his.

Weekend Hangovers
In which I attempt to help those suffering heal their wounds and reemerge to fight like sh*t champions again.

The Miami Dolphins are a tough bunch to call after watching them get dismantled on yet another Sunday. In this case it was Tom Brady and Co. embarrassing the hapless ‘Phins. Randy Moss made two ridiculous catches that further illuminated just how bad the Dolphins defense has fallen. Sure, the Pats O is the best in the league, but guess what… The BROWNS defense held the Pats to 34 points. Fifteen less than the once great ‘Phins D. What could possibly help mend the broken ego’s and dreams in Miami? The NFL thinks it’s a trip abroad, but me? I’m going with a full bottle of Robitussin as I’ve heard it can make you hallucinate and that’s about the only way the ‘Phins are going to think next week’s game in Europe is actually the 2010 Super Bowl.

What a rough loss for the Eagles yesterday as they, like the Packers, let Brian Griese lead a game winning drive in the final moments in their building no less. On top of that, they were held to nothing but field goals until the 4th Quarter against a defnse that allowed 200+ yards to one guy last week. So, was the demise of the Bears defense just a myth? Or, is the Eagles offense just that bad? I’d say a little of both, but a lot more of the latter. Thus, I’m prescribing a legion of white receivers to line up alongside Kevin Curtis.

Obviously I have to help out the St. Louis Rams as they managed to get manhandled by the Seahawks despite Shaun Alexander not playing completely sucking again and Matt continuing to look like Tim. It was in large part due to a Seattle defense who ran through the Rams o-line for 7 sacks and forced Marc Bulger into 3 picks. It’s safe to say Bulger picked the right year to holdout for more money, as he’s now about as overpaid as he can get. Honestly, I’m not sure anything can help this team right now, but theirs got to be something, right? How about 5 clones of Orlando Pace to take over the o-line? That’ll work. Unfortunately, they’re all finishing out the season on IR as well.

The Cleveland Indians choked away what is probably Kenny Lofton’s last chance at a ring last night as they lost to the Evil Empire 2.0. Getting blown out for the second strait night in Boston and officially blowing their 3-1 lead. Giving MLB what it wanted, a marquee team in the fall classic. Neither of Cleveland’s two aces showed up and their bats were quiet throughout the series. Their’s only one thing that might cheer this group up…. hookers, of course! Prepaid for by Mark Shapiro himself. Hell of choke guys!

All of the people who are saying the Pats are running up the score because of the whole Spy-Gate ordeal. That Belichick wants to punish the rest of the league for what happened. You’re a moron, Belichick wants to win games and win big because he’s a bit of a prick. It has nothing to do with what happened earlier this season. Sure, if you openly mention it (Yeah Wade, I’m buying what PK is selling there) then he might keep his foot on the pedal. But, he’s not trying to win by 17+ every week. He’s just trying to win and throwing the ball is what gives them the best chance to do that. After all the point of the game is to score and stop the other team from scoring. It doesn’t say anything about letting up if your opponent isn’t scoring. Thus, I’m recommending a swift kick in the junk and a “Nice tall glass of shut the up,” as well.

Quick ‘Scrips….

For Brian Billick it’s Viagra. I mean, who can get it up after watching that?

A fresh pair of underwear for Jeff Fisher as he definitely sh*t his pants after the surrender 29 in the 4th.

For the Steelers a nice helping of humble pie. The allegedly 3rd best team in the AFC outsmarted themselves last night by taking to the air early, and often, against one of the leagues worst run defenses.

For DeSean Jackson a bottle of Pepto as he suffer through another disappointing collapse in Berkeley.

For Paul Byrd… well he’s gotten enough prescriptions hasn’t he?

And finally, a nice big McRib for LenDale White who managed his first career 100-yard game yesterday as the Titans out-legged the Texans.

Scoreboard – October 21st – 2007

ALCS
Red Sox 11, Indians 2
Win Series 4-3

NFL
Buffalo 19, Baltimore 14
Detroit 23, Tampa Bay 16
Tennessee 38, Houston 36
New England 49, Miami 28
NY Giants 33, San Fran 15
New Orleans 22, Atlanta 16
Washington 21, Arizona 19
Cincinnati 38, NY Jets 31
Kansas City 12, Oakland 10
Dallas 24, Minnesota 14
Chicago 19, Philadelphia 16
Seattle 33, St. Louis 6
Denver 31, Pittsburgh 28

Categories: BD · Gisele Bundchen · Hot Girls · MLB · MLB playoffs · NFL · Throwing Knives

THROWING LINKS

October 21, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

Throwing Links is the Epic Carnival’s weekend link dump. Coming to you every Saturday and Sunday morning. Send all submissions here. This week’s Cheerleader is Lindsey of the Bengals as I’m a bit of a sucker for redheads.

10. Bill Simmons is referencing “The Hills,” and that’s just one reason he’s turned into a twat. The others include defending the Pats as they run up the score. (My Brain Says Rage)

9. TBP gets the man who runs Extra Mustard Jimmy Traina to sit down for an interview. (The Big Picture)

8. Agent Zero doesn’t just kill on the court and on his blog, but he also kills the rookie’s cars as well. (FanHouse)

7. It would appear you absolutely cannot use those words your mom slapped you for around Ray Allen. (Larry Brown Sports)

6. Well, if nothing else we know Ryan Garko isn’t an asshole like most of those at Fenway last night. (Foul Balls)

5. Speaking of assholes, here’s the top 10 in Cowboys history. (Viking Age)

4. Bill Maher isn’t interested in your 9/11 conspiracy theories. You’ll want to take those to Bill O’Reilly. (Crashburn Alley)

3. Would you look at that. Louisville’s QB has a website. Unfortunately, it’s not the one you’d think. (The Meaningful Collateral)

2. If Greg Easterbrook ever sneaks into the booth beside Chris Berman I’ll be needing a noose. (Nerds On Sports)

1. I really hope this is what the Yankees roster looks like next year, but I doubt it. (Thunder Matt’s Saloon)

Categories: BD · Hot Girls · TK Weekends · cheerleaders · links

THROWING LINKS

October 20, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

Throwing Links is the Epic Carnival’s weekend link dump. Coming to you every Saturday and Sunday morning. Send all submissions here. Today we celebrate fandom, the only way we know how. Here to you Missouri, hopefully you can outscore Texas Tech and shut everyone up about Graham Harrell.

10. Come November 30th Rick Reilly will no longer be writing for SI. He’s off to the WWL. I’d guess he’s a lock to sit across from Skip everyday. (Sports By Brroks)

9. Naming your kid after a city is such a great idea! I just can’t figure out why my brother won’t name his Juneau. (Red Sox Monster)

8. Wouldn’t be surprised to see Smash pull the “oh didn’t see that linebacker” on Saracen, but LJ? Not really a surprise, his attitude has alway been a question, but his talent is immense. Ahh dilemmas. (The Extrapolater)

7. What do you get when you combine bowling and football? This. (Sportscolumn Blog)

6. Dan Patrick has signed on with SI and starts in January. Anyone else thinks he’s the replacement for Reilly at the back of each issue? (Awful Announcing)

5. Tiger’s even richer, but if his flavors end up with titles like “ball sweat.” I’ll pass. (Signal To Noise)

4. According to EA Sports the Phoenix Suns will beat the Celtics in seven games. (USA Today Sports Scope)

3. Just in case you were wondering how not to interview a professional athlete. This guy got unbelievably lucky Sammy’s a good guy. (FanHouse)

2. Papelbon grabs a hold of what makes Manny, Man-ny. (The Big Lead)

1. Making the case for clubbing Woody Paige… sounds good! (Seal Clubbers)

(Image: College Humor)

Categories: BD · Hot Girls · TK Weekends · links

THROWING KNIVES: ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST

October 19, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

USF was the latest team at the top of polls to fall last night as they lost to Rutgers in New Jersey. Everyone was calling it yesterday, which made me think USF would get it done, just to to spite the world, but, they didn’t and their BCS hopes have evaporated. The Red Sox got one back last night as Josh Beckett dominated the Indians again and sent the series back to Boston for game six. Joe Torre is out in New York and it’s exactly what the Yankee brass wanted. This is Rhian Sugden, and she’s another higher attractive female I’d never heard of until now.

Down Go The Bulls
It wasn’t shocking, but it’s a little depressing as I don’t think theirs a team in contention that the general public didn’t want to see any more. Despite being a part of the Big East, South Florida just sounds like a division two school. Which is one of the reasons I was hoping they’d be able to run the table. Whether they won the National Title or not, didn’t make a difference. But now, if BC losses at Va. Tech next week then we’re looking at Ohio State-Oklahoma/LSU title game in which the latter likely romps. Not cool. I’d really like a decent championship game this year. If not for the team doing the plowing last year I’d have been really bored.

Anyhow, the loss was predictable and it’s just another upset in a sea of them this year. Hopefully OSU losses and we can get an LSU-Oklahoma championship game.

Back To Boston
Everyone expected Josh Beckett to pitch well and send the series back to Boston. He did exactly that, Manny homered again (oh wait…), and Kenny Lofton is irritable. But, as I’ve said Carmona will shut the door on Saturday. He was iffy at best in his first start, but tomorrow he’ll bounce back and unless Schilling is lights out the Indians will advbance to the World Series. If this thing does go 7? I still like Cleveland, but it’ll be even better watching Boston lose at home, in game 7, to Jake Westbrook as the Dice-K investment looks pretty bad.

Oh, and if Manny doesn’t get beaned soon I will lose all respect for the Indians.

Good For Torre
I’m about as vocal a Yankee hater as it gets and I’m happy Joe is no longer managing the Empire. But, for them to low ball him with a 1-year offer is a joke. I have no doubt the money didn’t make a difference to Joe as it wasn’t a large enough difference from what he made this year. But to basically tell the guy: “Hey, if you don’t at least make the World Series your gone.” And claim to want him back is a joke. The lame duck position is one that no coach/manager wants to be in and Joe’s is obviously no different. The Yankees I have little doubt are happy this morning as they expected Joe to say no. Yet, they failed to save face unless your one of those half-wits that was calling the Micheal Kay show on ESPNEWS yesterday. That’s right, they played live radio on TV for about an hour or so because this is such a big deal. Ridiculous.

Weekend Expectations
Cleveland Wins Series 4-2.
Michigan State almost knocks off OSU.
Florida will beat Kentucky.
Illinois gives Michigan their first conference loss.
Cincinnati finally shows up and wins big over the Jets.
New England wins by over 16.5 again.
Larry Johnson cruises past 100 rush yards for the second strait week.

Scoreboard – October 18th – 2007
MLB Playoffs
Red Sox 7, Indians 1
CLE leads series 3-2

NCAA Football
Rutgers 30, (2) South Florida 7

Categories: BD · MLB playoffs · Rhian Sugden · Throwing Knives

THROWING KNIVES: YOU GOTTA LOVE THIS

October 18, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

I realize the ALCS isn’t over yet and anything can happen and all that, but if your not a fan of the Sox you’ve got to be loving the Indians right now. Even as a Tigers fan I find myself rooting for the Indians to topple the “giants” from Boston after dispatching the Yankees in the ALDS. Tonight South Florida faces one of their few remaining tests as they head to New Jersey to take on Rutgers. I think USF will win this game, but it’ll be far from a shock if Ray Rice goes off and the Scarlett Knights knock off the Bulls. Am I the only person dying for basketball to start already? As much as I love football, it’s a once a week thing, once basketball starts it’s everyday. And yes I know Hockey started, but I could care less. Anyhow, today marks the beginning of the TK NBA preview is today as I take a look at the Atlantic and Northwest divisions. Autumn Reeser is smokin’ hot. Hopefully she pops up on some new show this year.

Enjoying Every Second
I don’t know about you, but I prefer small market teams to large market teams by a wide margin. This is probably due to having all of those teams shoved down my throat throughout the season whether they’re playing great or horribly. It’s always all about how these teams can fix themselves and make the playoffs, but why does it matter? Ratings obviously, just look at Notre Dame. Arguably the 2nd worst team in the country after UCLA (not really), yet they’re the most covered team in College Football. It makes me want to stab a 5th grader.

Anyhow, I consider myself more or less anti-big markets just because they annoy me. Well, that and I hate everything about them (Yankees). If I had my way every World Series would feature the Marlins and Devil Rays just to piss off the large markets. Which is why I absolutely love that 3-1 hole the Red Sox are in. I’ve acknowledged it’s not over, and anything can happen and all that. But, even if CC Cabathia shits all over the mound again the Sox still have Fausto to deal with. And it’s Carmona who shut down the Yankees in round one and showed us he’s ready for prime time. What stage is bigger than Fenway in Game 6? None. If CC can’t make it happen, I have no doubt Fausto can shut the door.

If Your Not Watching
If your not watching the potential World Series of Rockies-Indians your just not a fan. I get it, your team lost and you didn’t even know the Rockies existed. But, if your a real fan of the game you’ve got to be watching this stuff. Otherwise, your just a Yankee fan and no one likes a Yankee fan.

Chris Chambers To Chargers
A second round pick is a lot to give up for dropalufficous, but the Chargers definitely need another weapon. Chambers will be that and since he’s familiar with the offense he should contribute right away. I’d say this trade is more indicative of the Chargers mindset then anything else. I’d say it’s pretty clear the Bolts feel like they need to fully right this ship right away and compete with the Pats and Colts or those currently calling the shots (Norv and AJ) won’t be around to long. I actually like the Dolphins side of the deal better, sure they’ll have to hold open tryouts for receivers this week (Ted Ginn’s to busy failing to be Devin Hester), but adding a second 2nd round pick is a very nice move. It;s nice to see a team accepting that they’re going no where this season and preparing for the future.

The NBA Preview Part 1
I’ll be doing two division at a time until I’ve finished them up and then I’ll seed the playoffs. Along with projecting who takes home the trophy I’ll make picks for Rookie, MVP, Coach, and some others awards. First up is the Atlantic and Northwest Divisions.

Atlantic Division Projected Order of Finish
Boston Celtics
Toronto
New Jersey
New York
Philadelphia
Projected Playoff Teams: 3

What was the worst division in basketball last season will be better with the vast improvement in beantown, a second year runnin’ and gunnin’ in Toronto and well, New Jersey should be New Jersey. New York should also improve a little bit, but it’s hard to imagine even with Randolph and Curry up front that the Knicks will be able to maintain consistency from day-to-day. Though they could overtake New Jersey and sneak into the playoffs. The Celtics will be good, but it’ll take a little while for the big three to get into a rhythm and the big question is how big the lack of a quality point guard will hurt this squad. I’d pencil them in for at least third in the East. Toronto maintains all of it’s gunners and adds Jason Kapono and Carlos Delfino. Both of which fit well with the style and can shoot the lights out from the three. The big concern is the same as it is with any team who fires from deep all day, can you continue to win consistently playing outside in? As long as Chris Bosh can draw double teams and TJ Ford can find the open guys I have no doubt. New Jersey looks about the same, but they’ve got Nenad back and that’ll certainly help. As all they need is an inside force and the big three of VC, Kidd and Jefferson will do the rest. The Knicks are the wild card, as they certainly look good on paper with their new front court, but Randolph tends to get his head stuck in his ass, can Isiah keep it out? As for Philly, their a lock to finish dead last here, maybe Iguodala can get into the dunk contest and not get jobbed this year.

Northwest Division Projected Order of Finish
Utah
Denver
Portland
Seattle
Minnesota
Projected Playoff Teams: 2

Utah and Denver are absolute locks for the playoffs. While Seattle, Portland and Minnesota are about as unpredictable as you’d expect with all of the young players they’ll be relying on to carry them. Utah will be tough every night as long as Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer are healthy. If they lose either guy for an extender period of time they could miss out on the playoffs all together. Williams has turned into one of the best PG’s in the league leaving everyone to back off the criticism of drafting him ahead of Chris Paul. Suddenly, Williams and Boozer look like the Stockton and Malone of the future and all of the talent around them certainly doesn’t hurt. Denver gets a full season with Carmelo and AI side by side as well as a return from Kenyon Martin. While I still think their nothing more than New Jersey west, they can disprove that if K-Mart stays healthy and productive for a full year. Portland and Seattle could flip flop either way. It;s really a question of which you like better at this point, Brandon Roy or Wally Szczerbiak? Yup, Roy. I’m not expecting Durant or any of the other rookie to be terribly great right out of the chute. Minnesota should be the worst team here based on the overwhelming youth of the roster, but Al Jefferson is going to be fantastic soon and if he can get a perimeter player to play with (Green, Brewer, McCants?) this team could surprise.

No Scoreboard today as nothing happened last night and their no way your getting me to link NHL box scores.

Categories: Autumn Reeser · BD · Hot Girls · MLB · MLB playoffs · NBA · NBA Preview · Throwing Knives

THROWING KNIVES: TAP THE ROCKIES

October 16, 2007 · 3 Comments

by BD, Epic Carnival

The Rockies finished off their sweep of the D’backs last night to advance to the World Series. Arguably the least likely participant that I can ever remember. In the Midwest the Indians got the best start they could have from Jake Westbrook and managed to knock off the Sox to take a 2-1 series lead. I’m feeling pretty good about my prediction of the Indians as the eventual champion, especially with Wakefield pitching tonight on the anniversary of Aaron Boone’s series clinching home run. The Giants predictably won easily last night in a game that I doubt anyone watched. I sure as hell didn’t want it, only flipped to check the score here and there. I’ve seen enough Joey Harrington, interestingly though if Leftwich doesn’t work out Joey will be playing on Monday again next month. Louise Glover made me think of the Rockies, well, not really. Enjoy though.

Rockies Win NL Pennant
What happened last night wasn’t a dream. When you woke up today the Rockies were still the NL champions of 2007, not the Cubs, not the Phillies, but the Rockies. The definition of a long shot as they sat 4 1/2 games back of the wild card with just 9 to play, even longer 2 back with 2 to play. All the Padres had to do was win one more game in Milwaukee, or manage to beat the Rockies in the one game playoff. The Padres couldn’t get it done, that’s fine, the Phillies certainly would, wouldn’t they? Guess not, as the Rockies sent them home for good with a 3-game sweep. Then it was another long shot staring at them from across the field from Arizona. A team who was a perceived underdog themselves in their first round match up with the Cubs. A team who now is just another to fall in consecutive games to the buzz saw that is the Colorado Rockies.

What we’ve all seen over the last month has been unbelievable, but can the Rockies knock off whichever juggernaut emerges from the American League? Conventional wisdom would say no. But I’d say all convention has fallen by the wayside at this point and just like every year anything can happen. After all the Cardinals toppled the Tigers last season despite numerous disadvantages. Will this year be the same? Who knows, but regardless what the Rockies have done this far has been historic and none of us will forget it whether they win the whole thing, or not.

Giants 2nd Best NFC Team?
After watching the Seahawks get throttled by New Orleans, the Packers struggle to run the ball and the Bucs and Panthers be the Bucs and Panthers it’s hard not to think so. Sure, the Redskins are another contender, but I’m not sure Jason Campbell is ready for his closeup just yet. I’m sure you’d argue the Cowboys dominated the Giants week one, but that was a different Giants team. That was before the defense got it together against the Redskins and before Donovan McNabb was sacked 12 times. So why not? I don’t see any reason, and despite my dislike for the Giants I’d sure prefer them over Jerry Jones and the Cowboys.

Can Wakefield Beat The Indians?
I don’t see it myself, but I thought Jack Westbrook and Matsuzaka would each surrender at least 5-6 runs. Dice-K gave up four, but Westbrook was unexpectedly fantastic. Consider this: Wakefield is 4-0 with a 2.61 ERA in four career LCS starts. His opposition Paul Byrd isn’t expected to hold down Boston’s lineup either, but his career LCS numbers (1-0 3.60 ERA in 2 starts) are solid as well. I’d put my money on Byrd, but I won’t be surprised either way.

The real question is whether or not the Red Sox would be able to climb out of 3-1 hole with Sabathia and Carmona both set to oppose them. I’d be inclined to vote no, but Beckett should out-duel Sabathia again and who knows if Carmona will look more like he did in the first round than the 2nd.

Weekend Box Office Top 5
That’s right, the Box Office update remains a Tuesday feature as football season wages on. Let’s see how Eva Mendes’ nude backside did, shall we?

1. Why Did I Get Married? – Tyler Perry stuff, probabaly won’t bother seeing this.
2. The Gameplan – The Rock Says: “People are actually going to see this?”
3. We Own The Night – I’ll Be seeing this soon.
4. Micheal Clyston – Looks solid, but I’ll wait for the DVD.
5. The Heartbreak Kid – I heard this was horrible, not funny at all.

Television
Heroes continued along the same path setting things up for the long run of the show as well as introducing a new hero in Monica, Micah’s cousin. Her ability appears to be that she can mimic things that she sees. Based on the way her and Micah interacted I’d imagine those two will flee from New Orleans together at some point, though that’s likely a while away. The big story was the situation with Parkman’s dad, who it turns out it the Bogeyman that’s been harassing young Molly. In the end, due to a bad decision by Parkman, Molly tracks him down and he manages to lock the youngster within her own head. The episode close with Molly’s voice screaming as only Parkman could here. It appears that Parkman’s dad is the one who’s killing off the older generation, but why? We’ll find out soon enough, I’m sure. The Syler-Maya/Alejandro situation should continue to be good as long as Syler is pretending to be the good guy we all know he’s not. His plans to kill and take on the powers of the Dominican Duo are pretty clear, but can they beat death at his hands? I think so. HRG knows Clare is lying to him, he’s just not sure what it is she’s up to. I’d imagine once he figures it out and he comes face to face with West things aren’t going to go well. Reminds me a lot of last season when Claire was sneaking around as well. I’ve seen people say that Nathan’s reflection is actually Peter’s face, but it looks like Nathan to me and I’m looking forward to the explanation. Hiro and Peter both sat out this episode, but they’ll be back next week for sure. Especially Peter as hottie Kristen Bell joins the show and it appears her story revolves around Peter.
Rating: 7.2/10

Californication was hilarious as usual, but at the same time it managed some legitimate drama as the Hank/Karen situation continues to get more interesting. Meanwhile the little bitch Mia is peddling Hank’s book as her own which appears to be settled next week. Though, I have a feeling, Hank’s coming out on the wrong side of that one. The boxing chick provided most of the humor for the episode as Hank realized just before her climax why he didn’t call her back. That’s right, she’s a squirter and as Hank tried to warn Charlie he took the full show in the face as his estranged wife and Karen walked in. Easily one of the funniest, most awkward scene’s I’ve ever watched.
Rating: 8.9/10

Chuck continued along the same path for the most part while providing so much needed character development for both Sarah and Chuck. Sarah is clearly struggling from the personal side of her mission as Chuck wants to know more about her, but as a CIA agent she cannot divulge that information. As things progress she’s likely to become more willing to reveal and I have no doubt she’ll regret it as Chuck tends to say the wrong thing at the wrong time quite often. It looks like this show may not fall into the rut I thought it would after all.
Rating: 8/10

Scoreboard – October 15th – 2007

MLB LCS
Colorado 6, Arizona 4
Sweep Series
Cleveland 4, Boston 2
Lead Series 2-1

NFL
Giants 31, Falcons 10

Categories: BD · Californication · Chuck · Heroes · Hot Girls · Louise Glover · MLB · MLB playoffs · NFL · Throwing Knives

THROWING KNIVES: SO MUCH FOR THE DUEL

October 15, 2007 · 1 Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

All week we had to listen to the “Duel In Dallas” B.S. and as everyone outside of Dallas knew the Pats would thump the ‘Boys, once again proving just how much better the AFC is than the NFC. I’m not jumping on the 16-0 bandwagon though, as I think Captain Hoodie will sit the bulk of his talent once they clinch home field. I didn’t think the Bengals were going to compete for the Super Bowl, but 1-4? C’mon. The Madden Curse has officially stricken Vince Young, it may not be an overly serious injury, but I guarantee it’ll linger. LSU joined USC on the outside looking in this week as they ran out of gas in Kentucky. Cal, predictably, went down as well. Proving once again they cannot handle the bright lights. All of this leaves Oho State at the top and with a chance to makeup for last year’s whooping a bit earlier than expected. The slotted opponent? South Florida, but I can still get it right if BC can go on the road and knock off Va. Tech in two weeks. The Rockies are still winning, but can they handle a the long layoff their looking at if they clinch tonight? This picture is old, but it’s still Sophia Bush.

Duel? When Was Their A Duel?
So much for the hype, eh? New England had little trouble knocking off the previously unbeaten Cowboys in Dallas. The Cowboys doubled Moss all day in hopes that they could slow down Tom Brady, but they were wrong. You see those other two guys, Wes and Donte’ are pretty good too.

T.O. of course felt like the game could have gone either way, I disagree and am praying someone in the NFC establishes themselves as the ‘Boys have no shot to knock off either the Pats or Colts on the final Sunday.

It Won’t Be Seattle
I think it’s safe to say it won’t be Seattle stepping up in the NFC as they got demolished by a previously winless Saints team IN Seattle. A lot of people want to blame Seattle’s struggles on the injuries at the receiver spot, but Engram and Burleson are damn good 2nd and 3rd wideouts. The ‘Hawks offense as a whole just isn’t getting it done. Holmgren is playing far to conservatively and Hasselbeck doesn’t look comfortable at all. And obviously Shaun Alexander just isn’t the same guy anymore.

Reggie Bush had his best game carrying the load against a Seattle rushing defense that had shut down the Bengals defense two weeks ago. Bush looked about as good as ever, setting a new career long with a 22-yard rush. That’s right, career long, would’ve thought he housed one from way out last year, right? Not the case, but it’s nice to see Bush knock down his critics for a moment. That said, Bush won’t be carving up any quality defense’s on the ground.

Will Rest Crumble Rockies?

With a 3-0 lead and chance to claim their first pennant in franchise history tonight the Rockies are looking at a long layoff before the World Series. Now I’m not sure if it’ll affect the purple bunch at all, but after last season’s Tigers it’s hard not to think about it.

Super-Charged
It’s safe to say I spoke to soon when I declared the Chargers dead a few weeks ago. It seems I failed to accept just how brutal their division is. The Chiefs are their only competition and won when these two teams played, but San Diego should handle the Chiefs next time as they continue to get it together. But, can they really compete with New England? No. Not as long as Norv is running the show.

Vinny!
It’s insane that Vinny’s now made it 21 strait seasons with a TD pass. On top of that he’s already a far better option in less than a week for Carolina than David Carr.

Adrian Peterson Owns You
I still cannot believe the numbers Purple Jesus piled up against a once formidable Chicago defense yesterday. He’s the runaway favorite for Rookie of the year and he may already be the best back in the NFC as Frank Gore hasn’t looked quite the same this season. And PJ, like Gore doesn’t have a passing game either.

Could LSU Get A 2nd Shot At Kentucky?
Absolutely, but the ‘Cats are going to have to knock off the Gators this weekend to have a shot. I know it’s at home, but I have a hard time believeing they can knock off the top two SEC teams in back-to-back weeks. If they do only South Carolina can prevnt them from meeting LSU again in Atlanta.

Ohio State Vs. USF
If, (and that’s a big IF) this turns out to be the title game I like USF, but I have a feeling they’ll stumble and if BC can run the table OSU will win it without a doubt. That said, I’m doubting BC and I’ve got a feeling Oklahoma’s going to sneak in an win the title ala Florida last season. It’ll be another long off-season in Columbus.

Revisiting Expectations
The Rockies take a 2-0 lead back to Colorado. – Somehow I failed to realize there’d be two games before Monday. Anyhow, close enough.
Red Sox-Indians sit at 1-1 heading into game 3. - Yeah.
UCF almost knocks off USF, but falls just short. – Not even close.
Wisconsin loses again. – This one was a waste of text.
Missouri knocks off Oklahoma. – Close, but nope.
Cleveland beats Miami in the sh*tbowl. – Yeah.
Thus, the Dolphins, Rams and Saints remain beaten. – Almost, but Seattle no showed in primetime.
The Redskins make it 2 L’s in a row for the Packers. – Still surprised Washington lost.
New England beats Dallas rather easily in Irving. – Yup.

Scoreboard – October 14th – 2007

MLB Playoffs
Rockies 4, D’backs 1
Lead Series 3-0

NFL
Ravens 22, Rams 3
Vikings 34, Bears 31
Browns 41, Dolphins 31
Packers 17, Redskins 14
Jags 37, Texans 17
Chiefs 27, Bengals 20
Eagles 16, Jets 9
Bucs 13, Titans 10
Panthers 25, Cardinals 10
Pats 48, Cowboys 27
Chargers 28, Raiders 14
Saints 28, ‘Hawks 17

Categories: BD · MLB · NCAA Football · NFL · Sophia Bush · Throwing Knives · vinny testaverde

THROWING LINKS

October 14, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

Throwing Links is the Epic Carnival’s weekend link dump. Coming to you every Saturday and Sunday morning. Send all submissions here. This Sunday’s cheerleader is Charger Girl Michele.

10. Someone echoes my thoughts on the media coverage of the now eliminated Yankees. (I’m Writing Sports)

9. If nothing else, the Indians definitely have the advantage in the Mascot category. (Red Sox Monster)

8. Usually when the National Anthem is playing you stop talking and acknowledge the flag. That is, unless you have super-important lineup to discuss. Right. (Home Run Derby)

7. A little pregame podcast action for today’s NFL slate. (The Meaningful Collateral)

6. Just in case you didn’t know, Mike Lupica will decide whether or not you can sit in a chair and come off as a pompous d-bag. (FanHouse)

5. This headline says it all: “Derrick Mason Probable With Diarrhea.” (Larry Brown Sports)

4. Just what SportCenter needed, poetry! (With Leather)

3. If the Pats need a punter it looks like Captain Buttchin’s got it covered. (Blown Coverage)

2. If for some reason you were wondering what ever happened to the dynamic duo of Smoker and Rogers. (Ghosts Of Wayne Fontes)

1. The Favre amendment has finally been ratified, thank you jeebus! (Kissing Suzy Kolber)

Categories: BD · TK Weekends · cheerleaders · links

THROWING LINKS

October 13, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

Throwing Links is the Epic Carnival’s weekend link dump. Coming to you every Saturday and Sunday morning. Send all submissions here. Not sure if you’d call these girls NSFW or not, but it’s Saturday so we needed something to celebrate College Football.

10. A few last minute tips for this weekends games if you were having hard time figuring out who you wanted to cost you money. (Ghosts Of Wayne Fontes)

9. Another quality interview over at TBP. This time it’s Brian from Awful Announcing. (The Big Picture)

8. Imagine that, Mr. Vick isn’t terribly pleased with his Lawyer. (Kissing Suzy Kolber)

7. If marketing Jim O’Brien works for the Pacers maybe they should should just stock their roster with nothing but white guys. The only downside to that is that they’d be immediately throwing in the towel before each season starts. (Larry Brown Sports)

6. DeShawn Stevenson gets both higher quality and quantity ass than you, but can he hold a candle to Agent Zero? (The Big Lead)

5. Should the Indians change their logo? This guy thinks so, I disagree though. Mainly because I think it gives into the “America the pussified” that the country’s become. If your offended, get over it, it’s just a logo. It’s not as if everytime someone passes a Native American in Cleveland they start slapping their lips and making that “oh-oh-oh-oh-oh” noise. (Bugs & Cranks)

4. And I thought I was the only person who wished their was a “blow up the bus” button on my remote while watching Madden Nation. (My Brain Says Rage)

3. Ben Johnson, of all people is chiming on the Marion Jones debacle. He says almost everyone takes ‘roids. I’m not shocked. (Steroid Nation)

2. Doc Rivers just cannot bend back his excitement for coaching KG, Ray and The Truth this season. (Deadspin)

1. Agent Zero is just like Us, as they’d say. He also cheats at video games to raise his score and appear superior to all of the people he’ll never meet. (With Leather)

(Image: College Humor)

Categories: BD · Hot Girls · TK Weekends · links

THROWING KNIVES: HOW ABOUT THAT LONGSHOT?

October 12, 2007 · Leave a Comment

by BD, Epic Carnival

Is Arizona done after their #1 guy took the L last night? Oh, and forget about this alleged controversy. The ump made the right call. I think so, but we’ll see. I think it’s safe to say that the world has passed Bobby Bowden by. That new offensive coordinator sure isn’t working out and he can’t blame the team’s struggles on a lack of talent, because they’ve got plenty of it. Is anyone else ready to stab the next reporter who’s filling us in on absolutely nothing from Dallas, as we near the “dual” as their calling it. It should be fun watching the Pats defense dominate Romo like the Bills did, but can the ‘Boys D keep them in the game? I doubt it. The “other” 81 should be back into double digit fantasy points this week. The TK NBA preview will kick off next week, likely by midweek. Still debating a few things as far as that goes. Today’s I’ve got Jennifer Walcott for you, giving you another reason to hate Adam Archuleta.

Did the Rockies Just Win the NLCS?
It’s been said over and over again, but this team shouldn’t even be here. They accomplished the impossible with that run they had to close the regular season, and it hasn’t stoped yet. They improved to 4-0 in this postseason last night with a victory over the only guy to beat them in the last 3 weeks or so. That guy, as you know, is Brandon Webb and he represented the D’backs best chance to slow down the purple and black freight train that the Rockies have turned into. Yet, he couldn’t do it, just like Cole Hamels couldn’t. Which has me highly doubting Doug Davis and Livan Hernandez can do it.

It’s simple, the D’backs had to win last night and they didn’t. It’s going to take a miracle in my eyes for them to get to the World Series. That said, the Rockies involvement this postseason alone shows just how possible that miracle may be.

The Controversy That Isn’t
Or, alleged controversy as I see it. Justin Upton’s pop-up after his slide was about the most unnatural pop-up I’ve ever seen. It was clear as day he interfered and the ump made the right call. Justin, for future reference if your going to pull the ridiculous take out, stay down and use your legs to sweep at the guy, it’s your best shot and I’ve never seen it called interference. I just hope Arizonians (?) and ESPN don’t turn this thing into something it’s not.

The Ambiguously Gay Duo

With T.O. leaving only a note this week it’s hard not to feel like the real match up this weekend in Dallas is between he and Randy Moss. Or, at least, in T.O.’s mind it is. I can see him blowing his load all over Romo on the sidelines if when Moss catches his 3rd TD and Romo’s turned the ball over 17 times. Should provide just as much drama as FNL will tonight.

Randy Couture Leaving UFC
Couture tendered his resignation yesterday and vacated his Heavyweight Championship. From what I can gather, Couture was a bit fed up with his treatment and the fact that UFC failed to sign Fedor Emelianenko, who Couture feels is the only guy worth fighting. I cannot disagree with “The Natural” on that one. Couture is also upset (and reasonably so), about the way the UFC has treated him. This isn’t the first time we’ve heard of someone a little less than fond of Dana White and if White doesn’t figure it out he may lose even more of his athletes.

The toughest part of this for the UFC is that after Chuck Liddell was embarrassed by Keith Jardine, Couture was the most bankable well-known star they had. With his departure I’m not even sure who to look at. One of the Ultimate Fighter alums, maybe? Those guys have been pretty exposed, but the average fan isn’t going to know who most of them are. I suppose their’s always Tito Ortiz, but, well, he’s Tito Ortiz.

Weekend Expectations
The Rockies take a 2-0 lead back to Colorado.
Red Sox-Indians sit at 1-1 heading into game 3 as Beckett and Carmona both win.
UCF almost knocks off USF, but falls just short.
Wisconsin loses again.
Missouri knocks off Oklahoma.
Cleveland beats Miami in the sh*tbowl.
Thus, the Dolphins, Rams and Saints remain beaten.
The Redskins make it 2 L’s in a row for the Packers.
New England beats Dallas rather easily in Irving.

Television
The Office was highly amusing once again last night as Micheal kidnap the pizza boy, although it certainly wasn’t his intention. Dwight’s race against the computer was hilarious, unfortunately for D.K. Schrute it didn’t win him any points with Angela. Though, it did appear that Andy’s little song and dance won him some points, that is, unless Angela’s smile was only meant to hurt Dwight. Which seems like the most likely scenario to me. Kelli and Daryl? It looks like it, and I can only imagine the awkward situations Kelli’s going to get Daryl and Ryan into whenever Ryan visits Scranton. Micheal’s ineptitude with regards to the launch party’s location was almost a little to ridiculous. I know he’s inept, but really? I think he’d read the entire invitation and understand he wasn’t going anywhere but the conference room. Especially when that IT guy was there setting the damn camera up. All in all though, another fantastic hour-long episode.
Rating: 8.6/10

Scoreboard – October 11th – 2007

NLCS
Colorado 5, Arizona 1
Lead Series 1-0

Categories: BD · Hot Girls · Jennifer Walcott · MLB playoffs · NFL · Throwing Knives · UFC